07 April 2010

waiting

(I mentioned last week that the Lord is doing some things in our lives right now....)

How difficult it is to have faith in God's timing sometimes. I've been in a very long season of waiting. For several things, really, but there is one specific thing that comes mind: our move.

It has been just shy of two years since the Lord began to work deep in my heart about moving closer to "College Town," over an hour from where we are. It took a long summer of my husband working there, the Lord prodding me, and my heart softening. We were ready to put our house on the market (and I told people we felt to move) when John was sent back to the main office which is not so close to College Town. But both of our hearts had been stirred for this change and that did not die down. We began waiting to see what the Lord wanted and when.

At that time the economy was dropping fast, which as I've said before was a direct hit on us since very few needed the services of a civil engineers - nobody could afford to build, the lots grew weeds and foreclosure/bank owned signs went up everywhere. Yes, we've suffered from this, but I know full well that so many others have, too. We're not alone.

In the meantime, we pondered what the Lord might be doing. Our desire to move was still strong, but no longer a practical thing as the commute would have become impractical. We waited. And waited. And prayed.

Acts 1:4
And as He met together with them, He charged them not to depart from Jerusalem, but to wait for the promise of the Father, which, He said, You heard from me.

Last August we reached a point when we could no longer afford our home and the inevitable was foreclosure. So we attempted do do a short sell (where the mortgage company agrees to take less than what we owe.) Yes, we had a peace to go that direction. But by Christmas we needed to make some bigger decisions. We got an offer on our house the same day we decided not to sell. I believe this was all a ploy from the Lord to keep us waiting! As stressful as it has been, His peace has been there every step of the way. On Christmas Eve, we filed for bankruptcy. There was simply nothing else we could do. Thankfully, we own our cars outright. The house will go into foreclosure after all (as part of the bankruptcy). We'll know at least 60 days in advance...and per our attorney we should have heard something as early February, but guess what? We're still waiting.

While waiting, I've had some niggling thoughts within me, but never voiced them. Occasionally I'd bring them out to play and see how they fit, what it might be like. Then I'd tuck them back onto a shelf inside of me and move on with my day. A few weeks ago my husband voiced them - all I could do was sit in shock for a moment before asking, "You, too, huh?"

His words: "How would you feel if the Lord moved us out of state?"

He has been working at his uncle's company for just shy of 13 years now. I always assumed it would just keep going. And I was quite fine with that as I loved the security it brought. But it seems the Lord has different plans for us now. And one thing we both are sure of: we want to be where the Lord wants us, not in the wrong place.

So, we're branching out. He spent all weekend working on his resume and sending it off (and there are still only a few jobs in his field). One place in particular draws us both, though we're open to whatever the Lord might do. I suppose we'll just wait and see what He has planned. . .and when. Maybe all he's doing is asking for our heart and our willingness. But I think it's more.

Isaiah 40:31
But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.

6 comments:

Samantha Caffee said...

Oh hunny, my wait isn't quite the same, but waiting is never fun no matter what it's for. Hang in there. I decided just yesterday that instead of being completely frustrated and angry about all of the silly paperwork dances we are doing right now (for our adoption) that I'm just going to "be still" and enjoy he journey. Because if you think about it we wouldn't be here if God didn't want us here, so He must have some purpose for the wait too. I'll be praying that God allows us both to enjoy our wait.
xoxo,
Sam

~cjoy said...

thanks Sam...yes, I have a lot of that same desire to be still, to know Him, to just feel His presence.

Donnetta said...

Learning to wait seems to have been a theme God has continued to circulate through my heart for a few years now. Different issues, same process... learning to wait.

Be encouraged to stay in the process. He has a plan and He does not disappoint.

blue hose said...

I'm still hoping/praying that "out of state" means moving west! The house down the street is still for sale and I could not imagine a better neighbor to grow old(er) with. But, His will - not mine!

StephieAnne said...

What a great post, and how I admire your faithfulness in waiting. Having just studied about Abraham and Sarah in church the whole obedience/waiting/belief thing was really re-iterated. You are very inspiring.

momofmany said...

Wow!! What an inspirational blog!

Thanks for that. I really needed it. I am in a similar situation. I had not had any thoughts of moving. I wasn't looking but saw this house (I pass it twice a day picking up my kids from school) and I just fell in love with it. It's a long story but we can't buy it right now. I tried to see if they would lease to own and then about 2 days later, someone put a contract on that house. I was crushed. And I mean, I was really depressed for a couple of days. It still bothers me, but I know that God has a plan for our family. I can't lie though. I was sure hoping that house was part of His plan :)

Thanks for your inspiring journal. I believe that God does speak to you through others sometimes. And I think He just spoke to me through you!

I actually looked at your blog because I saw we had similar interests. If you ever want to stop by my blog, please feel free. It is a mommy blog really. Not a family blog but I would still love for you to visit it sometime.

http://momofmany-familykidsandchaos.blogspot.com